If a workmate is in crisis right now, you can help them call or text 988, Canada's Suicide Crisis Helpline, from anywhere in the country, any time, in English or French. It is free and confidential. For an Indigenous workmate, the Hope for Wellness Help Line at 1-855-242-3310 offers culturally grounded support, also 24/7. This guide is for the person who notices: how to spot when someone on the crew is struggling, how to start the conversation, and what to do if they tell you they are thinking about suicide. You do not need to be a counsellor. You need to notice, to ask, and to help them reach help.
Why the crew is the front line
Mental ill health is common in the trades, and the pressures behind it are real and structural: chronic pain and old injuries, lumpy seasonal income, long stretches away from home, and a culture that prizes toughness and stigmatises asking for help. Canadian industry bodies and researchers have flagged construction as a high-risk group for poor mental health and for suicide. The exact figures are debated, so this guide does not put a single number on it, but the risk is real and recognised. The people most likely to notice a change in someone are the ones who see them every day: the crew. That makes noticing a genuine skill worth having.
The warning signs
In a workmate, watch for changes that last more than a couple of weeks and are out of character for them:
- Pulling away. Going quiet, skipping the usual banter, eating alone, dropping out of the after-work routine.
- Mood and temper. A short fuse, snapping at small things, blow-ups or road rage that are not like them, or the opposite, going flat and switched off.
- Slipping at work. Lateness, absence, more mistakes, or losing interest in the tools and the trade they used to take pride in.
- Drinking or using more. Visibly using more to wind down or get going (there is a separate path in Substance Use and Where to Get Support).
- Talking about being a burden or feeling trapped, or saying people would be better off without them. Take any talk like this seriously.
How to start the conversation: the mate-check
"Checking in" sounds soft until you realise it is one of the highest-impact things a crew can do, and it costs nothing.
- Ask the real question. Not "you good?" thrown over your shoulder, but "How are you actually doing?", and then stop talking and let them answer.
- Name what you have seen, gently. "You have seemed flat the last few weeks. What is going on?" People rarely volunteer it. They answer when someone asks directly and kindly.
- Listen, do not fix. You are not there to solve their money, their marriage or their pain. You are there so they are not carrying it alone. Most of the value is in being heard.
- Pick the moment. A quiet spot, in the truck, at break, away from the rest of the crew, beats a public corner. Privacy makes it easier to be honest.
- Follow up tomorrow. One conversation is a start, not a finish. Circling back the next day tells them you meant it.
If they tell you they are thinking about suicide
This is the moment that matters, and there are a few simple things to hold on to.
- Take it seriously and stay calm. Do not panic, dismiss it or change the subject. Asking someone directly whether they are thinking about suicide does not put the idea in their head; it gives them permission to talk.
- Stay with them. Do not leave someone alone if they are in crisis. Your presence buys time and lowers the danger.
- Connect them to help now. Help them call or text 988, or for an Indigenous workmate, the Hope for Wellness Help Line at 1-855-242-3310. Offer to sit with them while they call, or make the call together.
- If there is immediate danger to life, call 911. When someone is in immediate physical danger, emergency services come first.
- Do not promise to keep it a secret if their life is at risk. Getting them help is more important than the promise.
Look after yourself too
Supporting someone in crisis is heavy, and it can stay with you. Debrief with someone you trust, lean on your own EAP if you have one, and remember you are a bridge to help, not the whole solution. Looking after the person who does the noticing keeps the crew able to keep noticing.
Common mistakes
- Waiting for proof. You do not need to be certain before you ask. A gentle "are you okay?" costs nothing and can open the door.
- Trying to fix it. Offering solutions or telling someone to cheer up shuts the conversation down. Listening keeps it open.
- Being afraid the question makes it worse. Asking directly about suicide does not plant the idea. It is one of the most helpful things you can do.
- Leaving someone alone in crisis, or keeping it secret. Stay with them, and get them to 988 or, if life is in danger, 911.
Know someone who needs this?
Keep reading
Was this guide useful?
Didn't find what you were looking for?
Spotted something wrong or out of date? Email us at hello@kilnguides.co.uk.
In crisis? 988 Suicide Crisis Helpline (call or text 988) ·